Sunday, December 30, 2007

CH3 Holiday Hash Trash!

When: Dec 14th

Pre-Lube: Riverside Grill

On-In: Joey Mac's

Hares: Krusty the Meat Miser, Wang Chunks and, as bag car, SATRAC

Pack: Nice T!ts, G-String, Goes Down on Buoys, Bend Over Mommy, Pubic Service Announcement, High Anus, Spunk in the Trunk, Jolly Green Vagina, Tonya Hard-on

After a snowy Nor'easter tore through town, the Cumbridge hash bravely met up at the Riverside Grill in Cambridge for a hash that promised to be knee deep in the white stuff. The
hares wasted no time in laying a Checkback off the first check then throwing the red powder in the deep snow of the park between River and Western. Trail wound through Cambridgeport, eventually leading to Wang Chunk's backyard where the pack enjoyed flasks of Christmas Cheer (aka Peppermint Schnapps).

After this cheer stop the hares gained nearly a 2 minute lead as the pack was anxious to find trail. The hares were so full of holiday cheer they nearly sh!t tinsel and Xmas lights in the Central Square vicinity after turning to see Buoys only a block away. This was an occasion to turn on powder.

After winding through the streets of Cambridge, there was a beer check at secret hare PSA's place. Actually, it was more on her stoop. The pack enjoyed Harpoon Winter Warmer and Sam Adams seasonal. Then it was off to hash toward Tommy Doyle's in Kendall, jumping on the railroad tracks and heading toward Cambridge St. The pack, it seems, had to dodge live trains in order to get back on the sidewalk.

When the pack arrived at Joey Mac's it was deemed way too small for circle, so the hash headed to the parking lot next door. Down-downs were performed on the knees (bitches!) so everyone was soaked through during circle. Accusations flew fast since we had a lot of good beer to finish. The only memorable one was Jolly Green Vagina drinking for hoarding porn on trail that he stole from PSA's bathroom. Circle was closed with a rousing version of "Today is Monday..." and everyone went home quietly to prepare their mullets for the Redneck Holiday Party the next day.

Krusty the Meat Miser

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

CH3 Holiday Hash

Get into the holiday spirit a bit early with a trail from the Cumbridge hash house harriers. Detrails...

When: Fri, Dec 14th @ 600 HST

Where: Riverside Grill @ 305 River St, Cambridge (trail marked from Central Square T)

Hares: Wang Chunks and Krusty the Meat Miser

Bring: $5 hash cash (just drinks), your santa hat, flashlights, legal counsel since there will be powder on trail

Promises: A short trail, festive beer, new pre-lube AND on-in!

You're already on santa's naughty list, so make this a hash weekend. Start with Cumbridge and continue with the Boston H3 Holiday Party on Saturday and Jingle Bell Run on Sunday! For info on BH3 events, click the link on the right.

on-holidaycheerintheformofalcohol-on,
Krusty the Meat Miser

Sunday, November 18, 2007

Hash Trash: 2nd Cumbridge Beer Mile

After meeting up at the Powderhouse Pub in Somerville, several intrepid and idiotic half-minds attempted a beer mile last Friday.

Hare: Krusty the Meat Miser w/ Spunk in the Trunk as bag car

Pack: Cuffy, Jolly Green Vagina, Chocolate Starfish, SATRAC, Taj My Hole, Goat Throat, G-String, Shorn Scrotum, Sugar Plum Fairy, Wang Chunks, Just Charlie, Nice Tits, Merkin Muncher, Beat By a Girl, Catheter the Great, Dude Where's My Virginity, Bend Over Mommy, Just Terry, Just Tricia, Virgin Renee, Virgin Chris and Virgin James

After hydrating with a pint (or two) the pack headed to the Tufts University track which happened to be next to the dorms. Who scouted this trail, anyway? Oh, right. Anyway, I'm sure the pack looked inconspicuous lining up at the start of the beer mile. The only ones who didn't look suspicious were the ones warming up for the event. And by warming up, I don't mean finishing a pint but actually jogging. Rest assured they "cooled down" after the race with a down-down.

With a quick explanation from "hare" Krusty, the beer mile was off. Goat Throat, true to his name, destroyed his can of PBR in 6.9 seconds to many cries of "There's beer left in that thar can!" That's when Bend Over Mommy inverted his vessel to prove that Goat Throat does not, in fact, have a gag reflex. There were several hashers casually sipping beer, pinkies extended, and having conversations while others were there to compete. And vomit. Speaking of, there were 3 hashers who "refunded" beer during the event, Just Charlie, Virgin James and Virgin Chris. Obviously their warmup didn't help.

Goat Throat blew away the competition with a time of 7:38 followed by Krusty at 9:18 and G-String at 11:14. For the rest of the results, follow this link to beermile.com. Speaking of, if this race is deemed "official" by beermile.com then Goat Throat will have performance #454 on the top 1000.

Circle was back at the Powderhouse Pub where virgins drank, onlookers drank for sweat test failure and Virgin Renee took her down-downs like an experienced hasher. Perhaps she's used to being on her knees.

This was hash 5 or 6 or 6.9 for Just Charlie who was pulled into the circle for a naming. He was not named Prom Queen, Likes it Long and Hard or Whiskey Dick. Because of his job as a writer Just Charlie is now known as Not So Long Fellow!

Circle was wrapped with "Today is Monday..." and Goat Throat's farewell pub crawl began with Keystone Light.

On-on to the next cumbridge Hash!

Monday, October 29, 2007

CH3 Run #4: BEER Mile!

The time has arrived for the first autumn beer mile of the Cumbridge Hash House Harriers. Although the CH3 typically runs the first Friday of every month, we'll be running on the THIRD Friday in November.

For those who haven't participated in a beer mile it includes 4 quarter miles and 4 beers. Drink a beer, run a lap. Do it 4 times and you've completed a beer mile. Congratulations! Any vomiting results in running a penalty lap but not a penalty beer. Head to http://www.beermile.com and see the ridiculous times that people run for this event! Will anyone break the record of 5:38? No, of course not! We're hashers! Details below...

What: CH3 Beer Mile

When: Friday, Nov 16th @ 6pm HST, heading to the Tufts track at 630-645pm. Due to time constraints, no late entries once the beer mile starts.

Where: Meeting @ Powderhouse Pub, 682 Broadway, Somerville, MA.

Hash Cash: $5 for runners and spectators, beer for all (yay!) but food not included.

Who: Dumb, dumb half-minds. That means you! And me!

Your CH3 Mismanagement, Krusty the Meat Miser and Nice T!ts.

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Next Hash!!!

It's nearly the first Friday of the month, so get ready for another CH3 hash!!!

What: 3rd running of the CH3

When: Friday, Oct 5th @630 HST

Who: Holy Ozone + Nice T!ts

Where: Razzy's (motto: We do class, locally.), 585 Somerville Ave, Somerville, MA

On-after(join us after the hash!): On the Hill Tavern (motto: Yup, we're on a hill.), 499 Broadway, Somerville, MA

As usual, hash cash is $5 and does not include food. Also, bring a flashlight out for this mofo, it's getting to be that magical hashing in the dark time of year. See you there!

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Next hash!!!

Since the CH3 runs the first Friday of each month, that means the next trail is on the horizon.

What: 2nd Running of the CH3

When: Friday, Sept 7th @ 630 HST

Who: Nice T*ts and Wang Chunks

Where: Cambridge Common, 1667 Mass Ave, Cambridge (trail marked from Porter T)

Hash Cash is $5 and does not include food. Trail will end near available food and there will be an on-after activity post-circle.

See you then!

KMM

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Beer Mile Results

Finally, the results for the first ever CH3 Beer Mile (click for a larger pic)...

As demonstrated by Wang Chunks previous email, we have a lot of catching up to do if we're going to compete with the DC hash. Prepare for the next one sometime in November.

CH3 will be hashing the FIRST FRIDAY of every month, so stay tuned for details of the second outing for the CH3 on Fri, Sep 7th.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

Success!

Those of you who check this site regularly may be wondering if your humble CH3 RA and webmaster died during the beer mile last Friday. Though it would certainly explain the lack of updates, it's not true. The CH3 was kicked off in fine hash fashion with a successful beer mile. There was only 1 (one) boot this time around, so there is room for improvement.

Thanks to everyone who came out, results to be posted soon!

Thursday, August 2, 2007

CH3 BEER Mile Time

The BEER Mile will be held on Fri, Aug 3rd@ 630pm HST

This allows plenty of time for registration and for hashers to get their drinking numbers (you'll see)! No matter what happens this will be an interesting event...

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

CH3 Start/Finish/on-in/on-after

The CH3 BEER Mile will be held on Fri, Aug 3rd @ 630pm HST...

Start/finish/on-in/on-after will be at...
350 Allston St
Cambridge, MA

D'erections: Trail will be marked from Central Square on the Red Line, but just in case...
1) Take the Red Line T to Central Square.
2) Walk down River St for ~1/2 mile.
3) Turn left onto Putnam.
4) Take first left onto Allston St.
5) Locate beer.

See you on Friday!!!!!!

Thursday, July 26, 2007

NVH3 Beer Mile

You could have fun like this if you're at the CH3 Beer Mile on Aug 3rd...

The Beer Mile

What: A BEER Mile to celebrate the first running of the CH3

When: Fri, Aug 3rd @ 630pm HST

Where: Location TBA but will be within 1/2 mile of 350 Allston St, Cambridge, MA

Hash Cash: $5

So, what's a beer mile? It starts with delicious, life-giving beer. Chug one. Then run a quarter mile. Repeat three times and you've run a beer mile. Check out www.beermile.com for more precise rules as well as some dubious record keeping.

Hey there wankers

The inaugoral running of the Cumbridge H3 is nearly upon us. CH3 will be conducting hashes for $5 hash cash anywhere along the red line T between Charles/MGH and Alewife. Sometimes it will be off the beaten path but one thing is for sure, the only rule is there are no rules! Except when there are rules.